when the morning comes

So i'm pretty much have the worst day, i've had in awhile.
First of all this month has been really stressful already.
i had to find a guitar case, which i did thankfully.
Then my computer decided it hated me, and didnt want to turn on. so now i'm pretty much freaking out about that, and i hope it's nothing serious, because there is no way i can afford a new computer. I just can't, especially now that i'm really freaking out about rent. It seems every paycheck i get once i start working again is automatically going to my rent fund. just for future months. i plan ahead.
but since i came home for winter break i kind of forgot that i still had to pay rent, and when i went up there new years eve, i was like hmm maybe i should leave my rent check. but then i didn't
and then i forgot about it.
until i got a call today from the lady who works for (or maybe is married to?) the landowner and she was like why hasn't your rent check arrived yet, and i was like dang.it. and right away i knew i was going to have to pay a penalty, and for some reason i suspected a $200 one. and i almost started crying right then. but then she was like let me talk to him and see what will happen. so then i made lunch, and mike texted me and told me the landowner was threatening to change the locks since i didn't pay my rent yet.
yeah. he was going to change the stupid locks.
i was like oh great, but i'm glad mike told me, he's a really good roommate.
i wish we would have become better friends last semester. maybe this semester?
anyways so i made lunch, and started to eat it, then my landowner called, and started talking really sternly to me. told me the rent check was 8 days later. that's a $200 fee (weird that i guessed it would be that). and basically he made me feel really small and like a piece of dirt. so then i think he realized he was pry going to make me cry and he told me he would give me a discount. a big $50 off. woohoo. :I
although i am really glad he did that.
but now my rent money has greatly depleted, and after i hung up with him i cried. for like thirty minutes. then i mailed my check and cried some more.
and now i'm pretty sure i'm going to avoid my landowner the rest of the time i live there, and i've decided i'm not staying there again.
i just can't.
i don't know where i'll stay next semester, but it's not going to be there.
and i also decided i'm really mad at my school for not having a dorm room for me. i mean it's just not fair that out of everyone they made me live off campus. i mean Mike is splendid and Clayton isn't that bad, and i'm sure they've helped me grow in ways that i wouldn't have been able to in a dorm room, but i just dont' think it's fair. if anything they should offer me a dorm room like next year for free. that would be the fair thing to do. but what do they care. and it's a little late to confront them about it now.
not like i'm the confronting type.
and well i was ready to go back to school before, but now i'm not.
but i don't really want to stay home either. i just want to go on vacation to somewhere really cool. Like California.
who needs school?
well i do need school, but that's beside the point, i just need a break from life.
and i'm REALLY angry at my old work. i worked there for two years and they didn't even have the decency to call me back and tell me that they didn't need me to come work for them. I mean i would have understood.
and i really needed a job this winter, i hate this economy, it's just not good.
and i need a better job at school. i'm going to have to find one.
and i'm mad at myself for when i did have a job, not putting as much away in savings as i should have, and buying things i really DIDN'T need. but it's too late now.
oh it's also safe to say after i got the phone call i was no longer hungry. so i threw out the lunch i only took two bites out of. what a waste of food, but there was no way i was going to be able to eat it.
so after i freaked out and cried and stressed out some more
Joe tweeted a video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UJKythlXAIY
not like i could hear anything they were saying, but i enjoyed it. and the fact that the song was called "This Too Shall Pass" made me feel like Joe knew what i was going through. creepy.
and then Jeremy (from days difference) tweeted a pick up line
Is your father a baker? Cause you're a cutie pie! - An original pickup line by Jeremy William Smith

and well i laughed because of them and the day didnt' seem so bad, and then Holly twitpiced a picture to me and that's the quote of the day :)
"When you're faced with a difficult situation, just remember that you are never given a burden you can't handle. So, basically you are never given anything that you're not going to get through. Not right away will you find a solution, but just remember, that you WILL make it through. BE STRONG."

and those things made me feel slightly better, but not as good as i was feeling yesterday when Dave finally responded after 5 days.
but whatever.
i responded to him today, half before the phonecall half after. so i'm pretty sure my tone changes greatly. but he's a boy and he pry wont' notice so whatever.
i need to go do something productive.
bye.